Are You True to What You Know?

Me and Grandma

Bookcase of Abe books

Splits

Twins

Baptisms with Barbara

Mom,

This week went like this:

Monday we went to DC and saw Fords Theater. Quick history lesson: Fords Theater is where Abraham Lincoln was assassinated. It was a cool theater I think my favorite parts were the chandeliers, the pillar made out of Abe books and the famous Abe quote that said

"Those without vices have few virtues."

What a guy. We also went to H&M on the main streets of DC which was cool. They had some rockin' sales so I bought some jewelry. P-day festivities *yay* we went on exchanges shortly after with the Franconia Sisters and THAT was my very, last, exchange folks. Holla balla. Say good by to Sister Training Lord Life 

Deuces.

We taught I. a couple times, that girl is stellar. We had a lesson on the word of wisdom and recorded her dumping out her iced tea :) We are really good friends. Obviously. She's straight on track to me baptized next weekend wahoo Iyanna! And she's already a missionary too. She knows a girl who is less active in the ward from school and is inviting her to church with her.

We had a lesson with Josh about the word of wisdom. He told us when he quit chewing tobacco his brother did too! How cool is that? He is a huge example to his family. I'm sure his brothers wife is appreciative ;) I thought that was awesome. Josh made us these little book marks with wild flowers on them *see attached photo* it was sweet of him. He's really trying to keep on keeping on. He's a funny guy. He gave a ride to an older lady in the ward, to church on Sunday. It was cute watching him walking at .0005 miles an hour holding her arm so she didn't tip over. Hahaha. LIFE THO.

I'm the worst at remembering what we even did during the week. We taught at zone portion about PMG and met a lot of new members in the ward and had a lot of uno wars and stuff just the usual basically. Everybody keeps asking me "how do you feel?" And it makes me uncomfortable because like guys I'm not sick chull. 

I guess it's like legendary when somebody goes home or something.  I don't like unneeded attention so I've been sticking close to the exits in case I have to bail. It makes me uncomfortable when people are like "r u excited" because  No matter what answer I give it's the wrong answer. So I just talk about the weather.

Oscar and David Reynolds from SHENANDOAH are coming to say bye this next week I'm stoked out of my mind. We have a lot of good stuff planned I think, a lot of people to go visit and what not. A lot of people to start saying bye to, too. It's weird. I can't believe I've been here since January. I've spent all of 2015 so far here. That's a long time. If flew by quick. I can't believe I'm leaving?

Church was wild. It was sweet though. A ton of people we've been visiting came to church, like recent converts or less active members. It was like a Christmas miracle!!! Because WHAAAT. it was sweet. We filled up several rows in the chapel. It was sweet. 

Over the weekend we did baptisms for the dead in the temple with BARBARA. I haven't done temple baptisms in forever, and never in the DC temple so it was really really neat. We played uno on the way up in the car and Stewart and I dominated. I love that game. 

I think when I get home we need to hop on the FHE bandwagon! Do you guys have legitimate family home evenings? We're gonna start. We should have preach my gospel lessons, I can keep practicing my skillzzz and we should play Uno,after. K? We can call it "Madis mission prep for Dylan, Ethan, Ty, Makenna and Eli" Lolol. I've got it all planned out. Y'all can make the refreshments.

I had departing interviews with President Riggs and they were awesome. Lots of good advice. Mostly we talked about marriage, school and work. I think I've got it all planned out and feel pretty good about what's going down. It was kinda funny though because President was like "how sure are you that you're going to marry this boy?" And I was like "sure" and he was like "there's an elder that would love to date you when you're home. I told him that you are pretty serious but he said that doesn't mean anything until there's a ring on her finger!" So that's cool. I was just like "good luck."

We also talked a lot about cool things that are a secret so I can't voice it to the blog sorry. And he gave me a sweet priesthood blessing, and a hug. The Riggs are cool people. Much respect.

Afterwards I got permission for us to drop by the lynch family in Burke and say bye. It was fun. Paul lynch. Is the man. He was the first person I met when I came into the mission field, at a members home in Manassas. So I had to go say bye. We're buddies. 

That's basically my week wrap up, I've got this week left as a full week.

Then next week.... I'm COMING HOME BBGS.

Dad sent me this quote in an email last week and I've thought about it a lot. He said..

"People have a testimony of what they have been taught, 

(meaning they believe to be true what they know), 

but have not or are not being converted to the Gospel..   

Elder Bednar has stated......

"a Testimony is Believing what you Know to be True......

but, Conversion is being True to what you Know."

That's really the next step in becoming a True Disciple of Jesus Christ. Becoming Converted or being TRUE to what we already know.   This is a continual process that never ends."

And That freaked me out.

BECAUSE

Holy. Cow. I feel like the last eighteen months I've been under a microscope. Think about it, I have a whole entire white handbook of extra rules and regulations to follow, I report back to like five different leaders every week, and I've had a 20 year old girl from Provo, Utah conjoined at my hip for the past EIGHTEEN MONTHS. 

So needless to say I've learned a lot, and built a lot of good habits and gained a testimony of many many gospel principles. But in, what, eleven days I have to put it all to the test? No more microscope, no more white hand book, no more 20 year old girl from happy valley conjoined at my hip (praise the lord for that one) and I think that's when the real test comes into play. I believe these things to be true, otherwise why would I be out here on a mission? The real test is will I stay true to what I know? And that's what happens after the mission. How will I apply what I've learned and believe?

When you're all alone and you feel like no one is watching what do you do?

Are you true to what you know?

That's what I keep thinking about. 

I think for the rest of my life I'll have Bednar's face 

flash in my brain asking that question

You have a testimony of what you know but

ARE YOU TRUE TO WHAT YOU KNOW???

I think for the rest of my life that will be my quest.

To never forget. 

Before my mission I remember thinking to myself

What's the big hype?

About this whole mission thing?

What's it all about?

How can moving away for eighteen months and doing a lot of

"Churchy stuff"

Change a person so drastically?

I wanna know for myself.

I think I figured it out.

But I think similar to Elder Bednar's quote, figuring it out isn't enough.

I get it 

I know

I have a testimony

Of this marvelous change

This marvelous wisdom, knowledge, faith and growth

But you can't just believe it to be true and forget about it

You have to be true to what you know,

You can't forget.

The other day in MLC somebody mentioned how sometimes we are

Big talkers, Little walkers

We talk the talk

We preach it

But are we doing it?

Are we acting on it?

Are we obedient?

Are we willing to sacrifice?

I understand now that life

Won't always be this way

But I can't forget.

Who knows what's coming up next. The next two years, five years, ten years. Thirty years. But We can be sure that the gospel won't change. And if we can hold onto the gospel and be true to it, then Gods promises are sure.

"... I would ask if all is done? Nay; for ye have not come thus far save it were by 

the word of Christ with unshaken faith in him, relying wholly upon the merits 

of him who is mighty to save.

Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, 

having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. 

Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, 

and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: 

Ye shall have eternal life."

(2 Nephi 31)

We can't forget.

Can't forget.

Can't forget.

I keep telling myself that. All the time everywhere.

THIS IS ALMOST OVER

IT WON'T ALWAYS BE THIS WAY

SO I CANT FORGET

I probably won't be carrying around fifteen Book of Mormon copies everywhere I go

But I can't forget when I did 

I won't be seeing all these amazing recent converts once or twice a week

But I can't forget

I probably won't go knocking on doors proclaiming the gospel to my neighbors for the rest of my mortal existence

But I can't forget

I probably won't be invited to eight hour mission meetings anymore

But I can't forget

I won't be wearing a missionary name tag anymore

But I can't forget

And why? 
Because there's more to do. There's a new task ahead. There's application to all that I've learned, all that I've become. Note to future self: If I ever read through all my old blog posts again when I'm sixty and bored out of my mind and Virginia pops into my head and I begin reminiscing on these past eighteen months of my life.... this is 20 year old me telling myself

DON'T EVER FORGET!!!

I think even though I'm a trunky mess (if we are honest) I've had an incredible past eighteen months. And the definition of incredible to me is not butterflies and rainbows, it's not perfect serenity, or 24/hour happiness and smiles and pure joy....

But as is life. 

In fact the Webster's dictionary definition is..

Incredible: impossible to believe.

It's impossible to believe that so many trials and so called failures and drops and hard work and sweat and tears could bring such lasting joy and peace and miracles and relief and friendship and love. It's impossible to believe a wild 19 year old high school kid just spent a year and a half preaching the gospel of Christ in a skirt, practice teaching gospel principles to another woman everyday. 

It's impossible to believe that a fourteen year old boy saw God the Father and Jesus Christ after praying for divine help and guidance. It's impossible to believe that the son of God felt every pain hurt and sorrow we feel today and died for us. It's impossible to believe that, that same man rose again to redeem us from being forever cut off from the presence of our God. It's impossible to believe that these kinds of events could completely turn my life around and change me into a different being. 

It's impossible to believe it.

Which is why I say it's incredible.

Because it's real.

And I've seen it.

And I know it's true.

So here's to my new quest,

To remember.

To remember it's true.

And to be true to what I know.

To never forget.

You're invited to do something similar. 

See Ya all next weekend.

Loves. 

Sister Stucki 
June 15, 2015
(11 days)