FUN. fun. Fun. FUUUUUUUUN.

Holy! Time is Flying.

In approximately three hours i will officially be 69 days away from leaving this beautiful city of St. George for the Provo MTC, and from there to Washington DC. Yup, the big capital of this Country! GO USA.

I'm so excited.

And nervous.

Mostly excited though.

Okay so this past weekend i was getting really nervous. Ya know. Because seriously i'm going to be in a "random place with random people teaching random people with random leaders...."

And I was getting super nervous right? Well lemme teach ya a little something I learned this weekend.

First stop Ross. Just buying some mission gems. And this, very kind, security guard striked up a conversation with me. And it turned into a total missionary experience. Which is funny because... its supposed to be the other way around. But God knows me. And Gods timing is perfect. We talked about the gloves i was buying, which led to why i was buying them, which led to his historic childhood memories in washington dc. His face lit up when i told him i would be spending the next eighteen months where he cherished so many memories!! And he wanted to know why it was i was going there. So i told him "oh a mission!" Expecting him to just 'know' what that meant. But no he had no idea! At first i was like Common dude you live in Utah, i know you know that i know you know what this is man...common........................

Nope. No idea. So i explained to him briefly what i would be doing while we walked up to the checkout. Yes, this guy followed me to the checkout. And we chatted. And it was good. I feel like i left a very good impression of the church. The only thing i was lacking was a stinking pass along card so he could learn more about the church. But i do remember him saying as i left 'Goodluck on your Mission!" as if he knew all about the mormon church. It was a unique experience that really boosted my confidence about this whole preaching the gospel thing. Which led to the next days adventure....

I met this boy. He asked me if i was attending college and i said no. Follow up question: Oh just hangin' out? layin low?

HAHAHAHAHA YEAH MAN.

So i told him, i was going on a mission, but this time i decided to be more specific because EARTH TO MADI most people think of james bond not mormons when you bring up the topic of 'missions.'

He too asked whats a mission? and what i would be doing. So i gave him a brief summary, thinking, eighteen year olds don't care about this, he probably thinks i'm stupid. And to my surprise... he answered "Wow. Thats really cool. I love learning about religion, i think it is so interesting."

WAIT WHAT?!?! COLLEGE KIDS FIND RELIGION INTERESTING??

K. Can i take a minute to rewind and tell you again. GODS TIMING IS PERFECT.

Right then and there, it hit me. My mission, my companions, the people i'll be teaching, the people teaching me, it is not random. Gods timing is perfect. We are all going to be at that place, that time, for a reason unknown to me right now. But it is most definitely not random. And this wasn't either.

I asked him if he belonged to any specific religion, to which he replied something about being "sort of catholic but not really." But he had read parts of the bible and found it quite interesting. He was concerned though, because some of the verses scared him. He said....and i apologize in advance for the profanity, but he seriously said this. He said it freaked him out that Christ was going to come down to earth, a second time, on a chariot, with a serpent tongue and f shiz up. MY FACE. If i could have gotten my face on camera at that moment, man. Million dollar photo right there. My jaw dropped. But i pulled it together and listened to the rest of what he had to say. He continued to tell me that he was even more terrified of the scriptures about lucifer! Because if their is a God there MUST be a devil as well! And started telling me about some belief about satan coming to earth for three days and capturing people and.....................................that was a tangent. He paused for a second and waited for me to add to this three days of tourment thing going on....

And i started up the plan of salvation conversation. It was Perfect.

I told him my church believed that before we were born, we were spirits in heaven. God needed somebody to atone for all of our sins, have you ever been taught about the atonement? (he said no) Jesus Christ came to earth, he was crucified and suffered for all the sins of the world, and if we believe in his name, follow the commandments and endure to the end, we can repent and become like him (he mentioned something about how he had learned about this before and nodded to go on) I told him, Jesus Christ and Lucifer both offered to come to earth and had a plan, Christs plan was that we would have agency, Lucifer wanted us to be forced to do what was right *He screamed PLOT TWIST, apparently he was blown away by this thought of Lucifer being in on the whole plan thang* Yes yes plot twist exactly. But God presented Christs plan. And Lucifer was angry so, he fell away and took followers with him. (This freaked him out he wanted to know who the followers were!) No no, the followers fell away too. Us being on earth, shows our commitment to this plan. We chose this willingly thats why we are here, to be tested and tried, we were given agency for this purpose, it was Christs plan. And he has given us a way back to him.

This conversation went on for a solid half hour before it was interupted. He was fascinated that he had made his own choice to come to earth, and by the talk of the atonement providing a way for us to go back to heaven and live with our families again.

I can honestly say i've never had such an in depth talk with the church with a nonmember my age. It was amazing! And has boosted my confidence immensly, i am so excited to have conversations like this all the time on my mission. I don't know what will come of that conversation, i haven't talked to him since! But if anything, it really prepared me in many ways.

One being, i always worry about what i'm going to say to people I am no biblical genious. But at that moment, the casual conversation just flowed. I just KNEW what to say. Its just the simple gospel teachings and docterine that fascinate people. I think as members sometiems we take for granted some of the simple blessings of the church, that mean so much to people who have never heard these things. Watching his face light up and these new teachings made my heart melt and my testimoney grow beyond anything i can describe. It was so simple, but i can see how it can change a life around.

The gospel is amazing and i cannot wait to teach it everyday for the next eighteen months.

From the famous words of my amazing stake president topham "You don't have to be a drone, have fun."

Seriously! Don't look at the mission rules and down on them. Don't look at them as rules! Look at them as guidelines coming from God to make your mission experience the best it can be. Look at them as goals and challenges. Make it fun, make it enjoyable.

Amen Brotha.

Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence

"With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now. Don’t give up when the pressure mounts. Certainly don’t give in to that being who is bent on the destruction of your happiness. Face your doubts. Master your fears. “Cast not away therefore your confidence.” Stay the course and see the beauty of life unfold for you."

I find it particularly interesting, the way Elder Holland explains through this article, our relationship with God, but also the adversary. I know that God knows me. He knows my strengths, he knows my weaknesses. He knows the intents of my heart. He knows my doubts and my fears. And frankly, the adversary knows as well.

This is frustrating, and at times completely.. UNFAIR. That God can provide me (or you) with this profound spiritual experience, where you just KNOW, you know who you are, what you want, where you're going. You feel absolutely sure, and so at peace with your life and your decisions. But nearly EVERYTIME, not long after these experiences, you walk right back into the everyday 'routine' of your life and the adversary begins to take his toll. He taunts you, places doubts in the back of your mind. You begin to feel like your at battle with your own self. Should I do this? Should I not? Is this really what I want? Your confidence wavers. And why? It felt so right before-


"There is a lesson in the Prophet Joseph Smith’s account of the First Vision which virtually every Latter-day Saint has had occasion to experience, or one day soon will. It is the plain and very sobering truth that before great moments, certainly before great spiritual moments, there can come adversity, opposition, and darkness. Life has some of those moments for us, and occasionally they come just as we are approaching an important decision or a significant step in our lives.

In that marvelous account which we read too seldom, Joseph said he had scarcely begun his prayer when he felt a power of astonishing influence come over him. “Thick darkness,” as he described it, gathered around him and seemed bent on his utter destruction. But he exerted all his powers to call upon God to deliver him out of the power of this enemy, and as he did so a pillar of light brighter than the noonday sun descended gradually until it rested upon him. At the very moment of the light’s appearance, he found himself delivered from the destructive power which had held him bound. What then followed is the greatest epiphany since the events surrounding the Crucifixion, Resurrection, and Ascension of Christ in the meridian of time. The Father and the Son appeared to Joseph Smith, and the dispensation of the fullness of times had begun." (Holland)

I remember a few years back, I had the opportunity to listen to my bishop, who I am fortunate enough to call my dad, teach a discussion on this very thing. He began by talking about our Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.. How they know us and love us. Then continuing to teach something that had never before occurred to me, he said "I believe it is just as important to realize the influence of the adversary, who wants to discourage us, and whose soul purpose is to make us miserable like unto himself." I think that was the first time I had ever really realized that, or put two and two together. That all thoughts of discouragement, fear, doubt and inadequacy came from him, the one figure who wants us all to be as miserable as he is.

Yeah I’ll be the first to admit, that freaks me the heck out. So there I said it.

And I’ll admit I was stunned when this all occurred to me like.. WHAT? But why? Why would a loving Heavenly Father LET this happen? If he has all power and control, if he can move mountains… why would he leave us here to be brought down and diminished by the adversary who is in opposition to everything good? And while we’re on the subject, why is there war? Why is there famine? Why do the innocent die young? Why are people unhappy? Why is there divorce? Why is there murder? Why is there pride and theft? Why is there people taking their own life’s because they believe this world is not meant for them? Why do we feel alone? There are a lot of whys, and a lot of people who believe these questions are unanswered, or simply do not believe there is a loving and caring God.

And that’s where we can apply everything, literally everything that the gospel teaches. 
Agency
The Atonement
The Plan of Happiness
Baptism
Eternal Families, Eternal Marriage
Temple Work
Covenants & Standards
Scriptures & Revelation

Our loving Heavenly Father, our God, sent us to this earth, as we AGREED before we came to be tested and to be tried. To learn and to grow, but only with the use of our AGENCY could this ever be accomplished. He set up a plan, of salvation a plan of happiness for US to return to him through the use of the Atonement, when Christ was sent to suffer for the sins of the world. We can follow his example through repentance and baptism, and by enduring to the end. By keeping and following all covenants and standards to the best of our abilities and being sealed through temple work, so we can live with our families and spouses because of the promises given to us, when we return home to that heavenly father who created us.

So there, is the gospel in a nut shell, it is a lot to take in. And that all hit me at once. But what touched me the most was the simple fact that we can all hold onto, that we are not alone. We are never alone.

“God will provide the means and power to achieve his purpose. Trust in that eternal truth. If God has told you something is right, if something is indeed true for you, He will provide the way for you to accomplish it. That is true of joining the Church or raising a family, of going on a mission, or any one of a hundred other worthy tasks in life. God’s grace is sufficient! The Lord would tell Joseph again and again that just as in days of old the children of Israel would be “led out of bondage by power, and with a stretched-out arm. … Therefore, let not your hearts faint. … Mine angels shall go up before you, and also my presence, and in time ye shall possess the goodly land.”

What goodly land? Well, your goodly land. Your promised land. Your new Jerusalem. Your own little acre flowing with milk and honey. Your future. Your dreams. Your destiny. I believe that in our own individual ways, God takes us to the grove or the mountain or the temple and there shows us the wonder of what His plan is for us. We may not see it as fully as Moses or Nephi or the brother of Jared did, but we see as much as we need to see in order to know the Lord’s will for us and to know that He loves us beyond mortal comprehension. I also believe that the adversary and his pinched, calculating little minions try to oppose such experiences and then try to darken them after they happen. But that is not the way of the gospel. That is not the way of a Latter-day Saint who claims as the fundamental fact of the Restoration the spirit of revelation. Fighting through darkness and despair and pleading for the light is what opened this dispensation. It is what keeps it going, and it is what will keep you going. With Paul, I say to all of you:

“Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.

“For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise.” 

“Fear ye not.” And when the second and third and fourth blows come, “fear ye not. … The Lord shall fight for you.” 16 Cast not away therefore your confidence.” (Holland)

(full article in link)
http://www.lds.org/ensign/2000/03/cast-not-away-therefore-your-confidence?lang=eng

Before I end this post, I just want to share my complete agreement with Elder Holland, and all of his insight shared in this article/talk. I know, now more than ever, and without a doubt that The Church of Jesus Christ is absolutely true. We are human, we have our faults and we are most definitely NOT perfect. But the gospel is perfect, and through it we may become perfect, and it is completely our choice. I am so grateful and blessed for the people in my life. The examples i have. From my parents, church leaders and friends. To the example of before prophets and leaders such as Joseph Smith. I know he restored the gospel to this earth, and i know that like him i can overcome anything that is thrown my way! And what a miracle that is in itself! I love the simplicity of the church and its teachings. It brings so much peace to my heart. I cannot wait to share it with anyone and everyone who is willing to listen and take in the happiness the gospel brings. I hope and pray that the Lord is preparing the hearts of the people that i will meet, and whether it be by fate or coincidence or an accidental occurrence, i hope the lord brings people out of their way to find missionaries who can help them along there way with the power of the spirit, and that they will find everything they are searching for.

"He whose name this church bears has promised that He will be in our midst, lead us along, go before us, and even fight our battles. He has further counseled, 'be not afraid of your enemies, for i have decreed in my heart... that i will prove hou in all things, whether you will abide in my covenant, even unto death, that you may be found worthy." (d&c 98:14) -Elder Neal A. Maxwell

The church is true. Love you all. I can't wait to be a full time missionary, I know, anything is possible with the lord on my side.